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Nov. 19th, 2009

  • 9:23 PM
I think my mother hates the number 17 now.

17 Oct - My grandmother was admitted into the hospital for a fever. Discharged a week later.
17 Nov - My grandmother was admitted into the hospital. She never came out after.
17 Jan - Her wake, the day we see her off.
17 Oct - My grandfather was gone.
17 Nov - A year after my grandmother's fatal admission into the hospital and a month since my grandfather's gone.

Suppose to do this two days ago. Like what I've always said, sibeh sian, sibeh nua, no motivation at all. Very brain dead, still recuperating from all the Happy Feet shit.

Got my perm employment notice today and so wish I got another contract instead. Literally see the gratuity fly away.

Sibeh sian.

Nov. 17th, 2009

  • 9:41 AM
I look like this now.



Don't.like.at.all.

:(

Now.

  • Nov. 16th, 2009 at 5:34 PM
I am having a majorly outrageous crush on the King of Bhutan.

I can't believe this is happening to me.

Boo boo

  • Nov. 9th, 2009 at 3:06 PM
Thought of jio-ing Mel P to Cambodia (we went Bali together) so sent an email to her. Then, came a rejection reply. Then, I realised I sent to the wrong Mel. And that Mel is my colleague at work... Sit behind me somemore... Sianz...

ETA: Should I tell her I sent to wrong person or should I act blur and take it that I had intended the email for her? This is so shitty.

Now I really feel like leaving for Romania or Bulgaria and be a gypsy there.

Tags:

small nignack

  • Nov. 9th, 2009 at 12:26 PM
  • This weekend, Happy Feet
  • Next two weeks, packing for office move
  • Regarding ^ it means moving to temp office at another floor and move back after reno
  • End Nov, starting ballet lessons
  • Need haircut but I prefer dancing with hair tied up
  • Then, maybe, Christmas mood
  • Then, another year will pass
  • Which, I can't wait

 

  • I wanna go to Transylvania horribly
  • I wanna go to Cambodia horribly
  • I wanna be a gypsy suddenly
  • And I have been feeling strangely positive of late and it is scary.

Yeah Yeah Yeahs!

  • Nov. 6th, 2009 at 12:24 PM
Anyone wants to watch Yeah Yeah Yeahs in Jan???

Nov. 2nd, 2009

  • 6:06 PM
Everytime, when I wallow in self-pity, I thought of things to write. Planned the flow of entry and so on. Then, no motivation to post. Too many issues, too many problems. Am telling myself, my AQ damn low. How? In the world, there are many, many more people who are in worse predicament. Some may behave like me, some may just continue to get on with life. You live just once, so why bother with the problems? I'm a worrier. I don't like uncertainties. That makes it very hard for me to forget about things and just let them go. I hate this state of mind I am in and I wish I could run away. But I can't. So every minute of the day, I whisper to myself the follow:

Things are not within my control.
Love means letting go.
I only live once.
If I am depress, I am not pretty.
I need to smile more so I don't wrinkle away.
Stop thinking about it.
Things will eventually iron out.

And I think about the alternatives...

Nov. 1st, 2009

  • 3:29 PM

Don't want to be here and now.

I hate you

  • Nov. 1st, 2009 at 2:44 PM

I hate you. I hate you. I hate you, you, you, you and, you.
I hate you.
I hate everything.
And I hate my life.

Read this from a friend's FB

  • Oct. 27th, 2009 at 2:15 PM
if there is a saying "till death do us part", then the beginning will be "till fate do us meet"

The small little things

  • Oct. 27th, 2009 at 2:05 PM

Missed call from HOD after a ring. So I called back.

HOD: Hello ah, I called to ask you whether you want milk tea or not but doesn't matter because I bought liao.
Me: Orh, ok.
HOD: So just take it that I didn't make the call ah.
Me: *sniggers* Ok.
HOD: Anyway I bought the milk tea liao, I bring back you just drink ah.
Me: *sniggers* Ok.

Oct. 18th, 2009

  • 10:35 AM

As I type out my entry yesterday, wai gong's condition started to deteriorate and it seems, during dinner time, he slipped into unconsciousness and into critical condition. The entire family was called to visit him. He was bad by the time I arrived. I told him to take it easy. He could ackowledge everyone. No one know how long he could sustain so some went home. Shortly after midnight, mom received a call from aunt/ or wai po and said that wai gong's breathing is becoming shallow. By the time we arrive at the hospital after 1am, he was gong.

My mother said he was happy.

Oct. 16th, 2009

  • 12:31 PM

I miss Wagamama's Chicken Katsu Curry suddenly.

Being 1/32 'ang moh'

  • Oct. 12th, 2009 at 4:01 PM
The verbal genealogy said maternal grandmother's paternal great-grandfather was a Caucasian borned to an unwed Caucasian mother, raised by a Chinese family. Believe this took place in mid-1800s China. Nationality was probably Russian.

Oct. 8th, 2009

  • 5:15 PM

I am being such a nasty bitch, meanie and horrible daughter to my father.
I hope I rot and die.

The week in summary

  • Oct. 4th, 2009 at 8:41 PM

Was on course for half of the week; Monday morning for a half-day service excellence course which is compulsory so I can get my award. Yes, I received a service excellence award, quite laughable given my attitude at work. LOL. Thursday and Friday at Safra Mt Faber for interactive competence which is pretty interesting. I found out that I am an assertive communicator which can become aggressive, depending on my mood, I can be passive too. Discovered I have to watch my body language when talking and presenting. Most of the time, I look extremely uncomfortable when I am not prepared and when I am caught off guard. Must watch these.

The parents went to KL to attend a wedding and I thought I could organise some lantern party at home and get some Island Creamery ice creams and muah chee, spend the night with some friends. In the end, it got cancelled cos one of the girl's doctor called and said they have a slot for lasik in the evening. Since she'd like to do it and have someone to take her home, we cancelled the party. No point insisting on going ahead with the party. So, went to aunt's place for dinner.

Then today, was suppose to watch Inglorious Basterds with friend and he totally forgotten about it.

I hate being left at the sideline, forgotten. Ta ma de, am I that insignificant to the extend where you can forget about the appointment with me or cancel on me last minute? I'm not going to be a pushover anymore. I'm not going to organise anything anymore. I'm not going to call anyone out anymore. ^&%(^#~#!(*

Argh. I can't believe this post ended up being a rant! On a positive note, I feel quite good this week.

Sep. 27th, 2009

  • 9:38 PM

Kind of inspired by[info]lumoszoga  and[info]orangesir doing the 10km, I slow jogged 7km non stop and body feels super cui now.

This is getting big.

  • Sep. 27th, 2009 at 9:38 AM

Father came into my room and passed me a piece of ang bao which has my grandfather's handwriting on it. My name too.
Gua, gua.

Sep. 25th, 2009

  • 4:30 PM

To lift my spirits a bit, Matt (a friend's friend) was posted to Singapore for work a while ago and that means I have one new friend here! Then, another person, whom I met only at Singapore Day, is coming to Singapore for a while to bum and that makes two new friends in Singapore! I can't wait to bum around with them to be honest. Usual gang of friends annoy me some times and all of us being complicated toxifies my emotional wellbeing. Gal pals all busy, one busy studying a new language in Japan, another busy flying and another busy looking after her little spawn. So... yap.

Still no motivation at all. Screamed at a colleague at work just now (but he raised his voice first!) and I really want to "dim" letter.

On the "perfect stranger" note - Bummed into Mr Hunk in MRT twice. Looks familiar and I think we ran the same route last Saturday. But we spilt after he ran into Punggol Park and me, onwards to Ave 8.

All these are really random because I want to write but has nothing to write about. Meeting BFF for dinner later, can't wait! Texted him and told him not to ride his bike because he is suppose to take the bus home with me together after dinner and he replied saying his EQ is not so low so he knows not to take his bike out! He is not BFF for nothing. :D